HONORING YOUR FATHER AND MOTHER.

The Fifth Commandment

By Nick Bibile

There are two tablets of the Law as we can divide into two.  The first part is our relationship with God and the second is our relationship with our fellow man. It is like the ladder where Joseph dreamed, the ladder set up on the earth, and the top of it reached to heaven: and he saw angels of God ascending and descending.  The first part is in relation to God, and is the top of the ladder that reaches to heaven; the second parts is in relationship to superiors and inferiors, and is the foot of the ladder that rests on the earth.

The church has neglected the law of God today saying the law is abolished and we are living in the days of grace, the entire society is affected by it. The church is the light to the society, the doctrines of the church is planted in homes, and societies.  We cannot blame the politicians for not enforcing the 10 Commandments; we need to blame the dispensational Arminian church for taking the 10 commandments away. (please see the context of this statement from previous articles.) Introductions to 10 Commandments
The Lawgiver
Christ and the Law
Fourth Commandment
Lord of the Sabbath
Legalism
Sunday Worship
 

Ex 20:12 Honor thy father and thy mother: that thy days may be long upon the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee.

De 5:16 Honour thy father and thy mother, as the LORD thy God hath commanded thee; that thy days may be prolonged, and that it may go well with thee, in the land which the LORD thy God giveth thee.

Lu 10:27 And he answering said, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy strength, and with all thy mind; and thy neighbour as thyself.

Now from the fifth commandment we see the second part, to love our neighbor as ourselves.

What does it mean when it says, honor your father and mother. The word honor in Hebrew is kabed (kaw-bade') which have different meanings, like heavy, glorious and heavy.  The meaning of the word depends on the context. On the fifth commandment the father and mother hold responsible positions of authority.  To give honor or glory is to say, that someone is deserving of respect, attention and obedience.  To make it more clear this commandment is between two groups. It is between the superiors and subordinates.  God has established laws and principles in the society. In our society there are different rankings of higher positions and lower positions. Superiors and subordinates.  John Calvin said, “Honour here referred to consists of three parts, reverence, obedience, and gratitude.

Ro 13:1-2 Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers. For there is no power but of God: the powers that be are ordained of God. Whosoever therefore resisteth the power resisteth the ordinance of God: and they that resist shall receive to themselves damnation.

God’s ordinances, his principles are clearly taught in the 10 Commandments.  God ordains these laws.  The author is God, and the authority comes from the author of life.  First we see in today’s society the family authority is broken and as a result we see a broken society.  Parents are not always right but they are always your parents. If they are wrong, you need to deal with them in love.  If children do not respect the authority of the parent, elders, teachers, then they will not respect the authority of the policemen.  The parent has not taught the principles of authority as the dispensational church have failed to teach the church of principles of the law of God.

The Results.

What do we see, we see mega churches, and all kinds of churches everywhere, we see revivals, we see huge crusades and thousands upon thousands coming forward.  We see the Christian TV 24 hours a day, there is Christian Radio.  If all these people are getting saved, then why we have a shattered society and instead of getting better and better we see more shootings in schools, more gang violence, more drugs, more violence.  The government comes up with the idea saying we need more police officers and asking help with the community with a program called, “take a bite of out crime.” But it is not working as every year the crime rate is increasing and we are living in a fearful society.

FBI statistics from 1997 showed about 1.5 percent of the country’s murder victims that year were killed by their children.  The children killed 83 mothers and 147 fathers that year. Kids steal guns and take them to school because they have no respect superiors. And they feel free to kill other kids as TV, movies and rental videos influence them.  The kids today have no rules and no fear of authorities. There was a 6-year-old in northern California who almost beat to death a small baby. The baby was just released from the hospital and has suffered brain damage from the attack by the 6-year-old. There is also the case of the 15-year-old pregnant girl who was shot to death by another student in St. Louis. In Fort Meyers, Florida, a group of teenagers shot and killed a high school band teacher. In St. Louis, one 9-year-old and two 11-year-old males were charged with the rape of an 8-year-old female in an overgrown field. Criminologist James Alan Fox of Northeastern University in Boston said, "Given our wholesale disinvestments in youth, we will likely have more than 5,000 teen killers per year."

The core of the problem is these kids have no fear, no respect, no rules and they become lawbreakers.  This moral law is for the superiors and subordinates are found in the fifth commandment.  Looking at the fifth commandment, John Calvin said, “The sum of the commandment, therefore, will be, that we are to look up to those whom the Lord has set over us, yielding them honour, gratitude, and obedience.”

Who is to be blamed?

The sixteenth century reformation brought the law back to the church, the Arminians are taking the law out of the church.
The dispensational Arminian church is preaching a gospel without the law. It is a sugarcoated gospel with a lot of entertainment, a feel good emotional type gospel, without true conviction of the 10 Commandments.  This false gospel cannot truly save anyone. Then we have the churches that believe in doctrines of grace, which understands that, the law and the gospel goes together.  It is sad to say that the majority of the Calvinist churches sleeping in their own bubble.  They do not want to rebuke or correct or to evangelize. But they do like compromising with the Arminians and the Roman Catholics.

2Ti 4:1-5: I charge thee therefore before God, and the Lord Jesus Christ, who shall judge the quick and the dead at his appearing and his kingdom; Preach the word; be instant in season, out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort with all longsuffering and doctrine. For the time will come when they will not endure sound doctrine; but after their own lusts shall they heap to themselves teachers, having itching ears; and they shall turn away their ears from the truth, and shall be turned unto fables. But watch thou in all things, endure afflictions, do the work of an evangelist, make full proof of thy ministry.

Natural Parents.

Your closest superiors are your father and mother at your home. It all begins within the family. They gave birth to you. They took care of you when you were growing up and we need to honor and pay respect to them.

Pr 23:22 Hearken unto thy father that begat thee, and despise not thy mother when she is old.

We need to honor and respect our parents without distinction, whether they are rich or poor, good or evil still they are your parents. Love them with the love of Christ, even if they are evil, unsaved you need to show them the love of Christ in you.  If they contradict the word of God, then you need to obey God first as God is your first superior.  It is the duty of the children to take care of the parents when they are old and helpless as they took care of you when you were young.

Le 19:3 Ye shall fear every man his mother, and his father, and keep my sabbaths: I am the LORD your God.

The word fear is of reverence and respect.  The Sabbath day was given to the family of God.  If we have a good relationship with God then our relationship with our parents will be good. As we fear God we know how to fear our parents.

Eph 6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord: for this is right.

Stepfathers and stepmothers.

There are also stepfathers and stepmothers who take care of children. And we need to have same respect and obedience to them too. In this capacity Jesus stepfather was Joseph.

Our perfect example is the Lord Jesus, although he was God in flesh, when he was a child he obeyed this commandment of honoring his earthly father and mother. If you turn to Luke chapter 2:42 and read until verse 51. We see when Jesus was 12 yrs old they went to Jerusalem and attended the feast. And they stayed there and after the feast they were returning to back home with the crowd and suddenly they realized Jesus was not with them. They searched for him and could not find him, so they went back to Jerusalem and found him in the midst of the professors hearing and asking them questions. There was a crowd surrounded and everyone was amazed of Jesus understanding and his answers.
We see the scene when Joseph and Mary approached.
Lu 2:48 And when they saw him, they were amazed: and his mother said unto him, Son, why hast thou thus dealt with us? behold, thy father and I have sought thee sorrowing.
 49 And he said unto them, How is it that ye sought me? wist ye not that I must be about my Father's business?
 50 And they understood not the saying which he spake unto them.
 51 And he went down with them, and came to Nazareth, and was subject unto them: but his mother kept all these sayings in her heart.
 
First, Jesus was subject unto his Father in heaven, that is why he was in the temple, and then he was subject to his parents, even to Joseph his stepfather.

Father in-law and Mother in-law.

We see how Moses respected his father in-law Jethro and Naomi in regard to Ruth.

Others who fall into this category.

Grandfathers grandmothers, uncles and aunts they take care of the children if their parents are deceased.
Es 2:7 And he brought up Hadassah, that is, Esther, his uncle's daughter: for she had neither father nor mother, and the maid was fair and beautiful; whom Mordecai, when her father and mother were dead, took for his own daughter.

Ministers (Pastors) in the Church.

1Co 4:15 For though ye have ten thousand instructors in Christ, yet have ye not many fathers: for in Christ Jesus I have begotten you through the gospel.

Apostle Paul calls himself a father to the Corinthian Church.  Also we see Paul calling Timothy his Son in the faith, and for Timothy Paul was father to him.  We also see Elisha called Elijah his father.
2Ki 2:12 And Elisha saw it, and he cried, my father, my father, the chariot of Israel, and the horsemen thereof. And he saw him no more: and he took hold of his own clothes, and rent them in two pieces.

We are all servants and still God has an order, the superiors and the subordinates.  There should be respect and honor to the Ministers who teach the word of God and warns you of false doctrines.

1Ti 5:17  Let the elders that rule well be counted worthy of double honour, especially they who labour in the word and doctrine.

Civil Relationships.

We need to pay respect and honor to our immediate superiors at work.

Eph 6:5 Servants, be obedient to them that are your masters according to the flesh, with fear and trembling, in singleness of your heart, as unto Christ;

David called Saul his father, even when Saul has hunting for David, and wanted to kill David.

1Sa 24:11 Moreover, my father, see, yea, see the skirt of thy robe in my hand: for in that I cut off the skirt of thy robe, and killed thee not, know thou and see that there is neither evil nor transgression in mine hand, and I have not sinned against thee; yet thou huntest my soul to take it.

The elderly.

1Ti 5:1 Rebuke not an elder, but intreat him as a father; and the younger men as brethren; the elder women as mothers; the younger as sisters, with all purity.

Application

Fear of God.

De 4:10 Specially the day that thou stoodest before the LORD thy God in Horeb, when the LORD said unto me, Gather me the people together, and I will make them hear my words, that they may learn to fear me all the days that they shall live upon the earth, and that they may teach their children.

De 8:6 Therefore thou shalt keep the commandments of the LORD thy God, to walk in his ways, and to fear him.

Fear the law of God.

Mt 15:4 For God commanded, saying, Honour thy father and mother: and, He that curseth father or mother let him die the death.

De 21:18  If a man have a stubborn and rebellious son, which will not obey the voice of his father, or the voice of his mother, and that, when they have chastened him, will not hearken unto them: Then shall his father and his mother lay hold on him, and bring him out unto the elders of his city, and unto the gate of his place; And they shall say unto the elders of his city, This our son is stubborn and rebellious, he will not obey our voice; he is a glutton, and a drunkard.  And all the men of his city shall stone him with stones, that he die: so shalt thou put evil away from among you; and all Israel shall hear, and fear.
 
Advise to parents.

Be careful to bring them up in the fear and nurture of the Lord. 'Bring them up in the admonition of the Lord.' Eph 6: 4. We need to communicate the heinous of sin to our children. Augustine says that his mother, Monica, travailed more for his spiritual birth than his natural.  Mother is the teacher in the home; if we really love our children we would take time in their spiritual nourishment and growth.  Timothy's mother instructed him from a child. 2 Tim 3: 15.  “And that from a child thou hast known the holy scriptures, which are able to make thee wise unto salvation through faith which is in Christ Jesus.”  She not only gave him her breast-milk, but 'the sincere milk of the word.' Season your children with good principles.  Obadiah said, “… but I thy servant fear the LORD from my youth. (1 Kings 18: 12.) Children are like young plants, which you must be continually watering with good instruction. 'Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.' Prov 22: 6. The more your children fear God, the more they will honour you.

Do not spoil them.

If you would have your children honour you, keep up parental authority: be kind, but do not spoil them. If you let them get too much ahead, they will condemn you instead of honouring you.
Do not spare the rod.  'Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and deliver his soul from hell.' Prov 23: 14. A child that is spoiled is going to be a thorn in the parent when that child becomes an adult. David spoiled Adonijah, and Absalom and they became a thorn in his flesh. Eli the high priest did not discipline his sons,  1Sa 2:12 “Now the sons of Eli were sons of Belial; they knew not the LORD.” God killed his sons because of their sins.

Do not allow your children to live in idleness in watching TV.  Idleness is the devil’s pleasure resort. Make them busy, when I was young we did not have TV, but my father always made sure that we did not live in idleness, we always had something to do.  Parents do not provoke your children to anger. Do not curse them; if you do they will copy you.  They need to see the Lord in your life and when they grow up; even if they fall they will return to the truth like the prodigal son.

The parents need to set an example to the children.

The children will not listen to you unless you practise what you preach them.  The parents need to set the guidelines and follow them. If you do what you say, the children will follow you.

 1Co 11:1 Be ye followers of me, even as I also am of Christ.
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